19. That is the magic number for young female members of the Church to serve a mission. 19 down from 21. My first reaction was shock. My second reaction was excitement. My third reaction was jealously and regret. I thought Oh, if only I that change had been made 7 years ago...
I always wanted to serve a full-time mission as a young adult, and I always thought I would. I loved the gospel, I loved the Lord, and I wasn't going to be one of those girls who got married right out of high school.
My life didn't quite turn out that way. I wasn't quite that girl who got married right out of high school. I was two months shy of 21 (i.e. I was 20...) and I had a two and half years of college under my belt. At that time the age for female missionary service was 21, and as you can see I didn't make it to that magical age before I got married. So I didn't go.
For the record I don't regret marrying young. These have been 5 of the happiest years of my life. I don't regret marrying Mark. He is the best thing that ever happened to me. I was so happy to be married when my dad passed away. It is wonderful to me that my dad knew Mark as my husband and not just as some guy I liked, especially since he will not know any of my children.
But there is a small part of me that still wishes I had served a mission. It is a very small part. But it hides away at the back of my heart and sighs for the lost opportunity. And today the announcement was made that 19 is now the magic age. That small part at the back of my heart said to me today "I would have gone on that mission if that had been the allowed age back then."
And I have to say to that small part of my heart "Trust in the Lord with all thy heart and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him and he shall direct thy paths" and "For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the Lord."
I wish I could have served a mission but that was not the path for me. I have to look at the path the Lord has led me down and rejoice and be thankful. I know it is extremely ungrateful of me to not bow down and thank the Lord for guiding me the way he has. The timing of my life has been superb. I have a wonderful husband. I have a wonderful child. I got to teach wonderful children in the public school system. I have met so many wonderful people in the short years of my life. And you only meet the right people when you are in the right place at the right time and I thank the Lord that I have been. A mission wasn't the right thing for me at that time. It wasn't in the plan Heavenly Father laid out for me. He had other plans for me, other ways for me to grow and develop, other expectations for me to meet. So to the sadness in my heart I say we'ļl serve later and to the universe I say may this new announcement make the timing perfect for other young women of faith in my religion and may they go out and meet those people at the right time and in the right place who are ready to hear the gospel of Jesus Christ from their lips. God bless the Prophet and all those whose lives will forever be changed by his inspired counsel today.
2 comments:
Just look forward to the day when you can serve with your husband later on. It will probably be just as fulfilling, if not more. :)
AMEN!! I should just copy and paste this onto my blog! I felt EXACTLY the same way. Jealousy mixed with awe mixed with joy and gratitude at belonging to this amazing living Church, and knowing that Heavenly Father's plan for my life was different. Also there was a sudden twinge of pain/excitement realizing that I may have one year less to prepare to send off my first missionary. That would make it less than 4 years now!
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